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The first time I felt worthless on my knees

Was in church feeling nothing

While everyone was crying out for a higher power to save them

Most recently was in a girls closet

Screaming hallelujah and our hands discovering secrets

Afterwards she spilled her sins to me

Listing our illicit liaison as number one

I crave shelter but refuse to be saved

I despise myself and can’t trust anyone who says they love me

It’s all a trap for me to drag myself down so they can lift themselves up

Swallowing prescription pills for an illusion of pleasure

Emotion is an distant recollection for me

If I let Jesus rescue me from this hell

Would I have been able to discover myself

No, I would still be drawing rainbows over my cuts

Hoping that one day I would be enough

I’m a raging liability who doesn’t know how to love someone

Whose been escaping responsibility since she learned how to run

Survival mode on autopilot

I’m asleep at the wheel

Bringing the poor passengers crashing along with the plane

Being pretty is a foreign concept for me

I’m only as beautiful as the backhanded compliments I receive

From girls I don’t know at strangers’ parties

My therapist claims I’m mature for my age

I feel like I haven’t grown since I entered kindergarten

I was sad even back then

I don’t know if that would ever change

I’ll be the same mistake I am today

To the moment I’m lying beneath a grave

Grace is a 17 year old poet who hopes to one day travel the world. She hopes you have a great day.

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